Basil: i was raised on cock flavored soup

Basil: you can't take a dump in a dream. it's like dying...or me getting laid.

"If marrying mad bitches is faggy, call me Rob Betrand!"-Andy

Basil: It's official: Not even the _New York Times_ uses apostrophes correctly.
Andy: I blame the internet and by association Al Gore. So it's official, Al Gore = Bad Grammar
Basil: And the school. Don't forget the schools.
Andy: Hmmm too much to blame. We need a single scapegoat...How about the jews? They've gotten off relatively easy over the course of history, right?
Basil: Shit. Lost. You Win.

Drucker: white people make asians look like black people

Basil: (While watching two cats fight) "Well, that's not appealing at all."

Basil: It's kind of hard to be mad at him for saying "hey whitey, get out!"

Basil: Black people don't pay money to see things!